Tuesday, April 01, 2008
After three years in business selling handmade work by independent American and international artisans, we have decided that it is time to expand our business model in order to grow.
So today we are launching the Greenjeans Globalization Initiative which will allow us to diversify our offerings and significantly lower our prices.
In order to accomplish this, we are going to start buying only goods "handmade" overseas by companies committed to utilizing child labor, coal-fueled sweatshop factories, and plenty of nonrenewable resources.
We will, at the same time, be severing all ties with the independent artisans you've come to know and love, but don't worry -- we're exporting all their designs to the overseas factories and will sell the "authentic knock-offs" at bargain-basement prices!
We're putting 110% effort behind this new plan, which is sure to be a big win-win-win!
So join us in our new effort to "just say no" to handmade, and say YES to the Greenjeans Globalization Initiative! Because it's high time we all embrace the Industrial Revolution, before it's a thing of the past...